Charlene White shares grief after father's suicide

Charlene White, a presenter on Loose Women, has shared her feelings of failure and profound grief one year after her father died by suicide. In an Instagram post, White reflected on the 12 months since the death of her father, Denniston, who took his own life in October last year.

White, 46, detailed the night she learned of her father's death. She was returning home from a friend's birthday celebration when she received a call just before midnight. The call informed her of his passing, leading her to experience a severe panic attack on the roadside.

Upon arriving home, White encountered a scene of flashing blue lights and uniformed officers. A police officer from Lewisham Police Station then explained the circumstances of her father's death. She described the subsequent task of informing family and friends as one of the most difficult experiences of her life.

Reflecting on the past year, White wrote on Instagram, "In many ways I feel like I failed him, by not knowing what he was going through. I can wish for things to be different a million times, but wishing can’t turn back time." She described an "almost ever present sadness in the pit of my stomach" and a constant swirl of "anger, grief, confusion and sadness."

White explained that her grief has been all-consuming, sometimes making daily tasks like getting out of bed, parenting, and going to work a challenge. She noted that the lack of a clear answer as to why her father made the decision to end his life has left her with "a weird kind of unfinished grief."

She shared her story after receiving messages from other individuals who have lost loved ones to suicide. White urged anyone struggling with their mental health to reach out for help. "The darkness will make you believe you’re alone, please don’t listen to it," she advised.

White also expressed gratitude to the police officers from Lewisham Police Station who responded on the night, as well as the counselling team at the charity Suicide and Co, her friends, family, partner, and children. She also shared links to support services including Samaritans, Calm, and Black Minds Matter.